Bridezilla Justine here, just poking my head up from the haze of wedding planning to observe the real world for a second. While the title of this post may sound like it’s super well planned and carefully weighed before being written [I guess the word "truths" may lead you to that conclusion], it’s actually just some late night ramblings from a bride who’s getting married 5 weeks from today and spent half the weekend scraping lead based paint off of really old windows and then inhaling spray paint. So, ya know. Take this as you will.
1. You’re gonna fight about wedding stuff.
The biggest things Gabe and I have fought about? There’s really only been two subjects that seem to come up again…and again…and again. A) Guest list. Who to invite? What about his girlfriend? No, we don’t even really like them. No, you haven’t seen them in three years. I’ve never met that person. Maybe if enough people say no. Etc. B) Cake. Umm…I don’t know. I think I’m gonna chalk this one up to wedding madness and different priorities, but we sure fought about this one a lot. It got to the point where he would just mention the word “cake” and I would turn into a crazed lunatic. It was basically my trigger word for the past 6 weeks or so. After one final blow up regarding [trigger word]-pops last week, I think we may be past it [may be speaking too soon, but I'm being positive]. The point is, you’ll fight. You’ll disagree and probably have to “agree to disagree” Being engaged=romantic, wonderful, precious. Wedding planning= not, about 85% of the time.
2. You WILL BE wedding obsessed for at least 4-5 months before the wedding.
We got engaged in October. We coasted through November and December, choosing our big vendors, pinning ideas, daydreaming about our big day. Then New Years hit and suddenly I was obsessed. Though I’ve always sympathized with brides before, I now know that no one really knows the extent to which it consumes your life unless you’ve recently [5-7 years ago or less] gotten married or lived with someone planning a wedding. It has to be recent, because I think your brain lovingly lets you forget it after a while. I can tell when someone’s planned a wedding recently when they ask me “How’s it going?” with a look that’s equal parts concern and sympathy. It’s been too long or hasn’t happened yet when they say, “Omg, are you soooo excited?” with eyes of excitement and joyful anticipation. Yes, your wedding will take over your life. You will feel overwhelmed and have moments where you seriously consider eloping [but not to Vegas, to somewhere much classier, like maybe Cancun]. Get used to it.
3. You will need a team of supporters behind you, or you might run away and never come back.
Because the details and projects just…never…end. Even after a weekend like this one, during which we worked hard and got LOTS of stuff done [thanks babe! The image of you sanding 17 (!) wooden two inch cubes will be one I file away in my memory forever], the mountain of projects is still incredibly high. You’ll probably have at least 12 to do lists you’re working off of at any given moment…and almost everything will take longer than you think it will. But if you have people willing to shoulder the wedding obsession with you [mom! fiance! you're both amazing!] and spend their weekends doing yardwork so the backyard looks amazing for your dream taco rehearsal dinner [dad! midgey! i love you], you’ll make it through.
4. It will be crazy. But the true test of love is planning a wedding together. And at the end of it you’ll be MARRIED.
Yep, you read that right. I’ve identified the true test of love. Okay, while this
may not be definitely is not the ULTIMATE test of love, it’s a doozy, especially with two very opinionated, headstrong people who care about details and apparently have both been nursing visions of their wedding day for years [that would be us]. But even though it’s insane and crazy and stressful, it’s also fun and exciting. It’s the biggest party we’ll ever plan, and it’s going to be the most important day of our lives so far. As a friend told me right after we got engaged, “Enjoy wedding planning…you only get to do it once.” Might as well go all the way, right? I can’t wait to marry Gabe in 5 weeks, surrounded by all of our family & best friends, dancing the night away and eating tacos. It’s gonna be awesome, and no doubt in my mind that it’s worth all the craziness. But still…keep in mind before you pin to that secret wedding board you started on Pinterest…you’ll only be wedding free for so long.